Recently, a new consulting client figured out he was an ENFP like I am, and joked about how he could use my personal anecdotes as a cheat sheet for both his business and personal life. 

I share these stories—from dating, running a business, and other shenanigans—pretty frequently in my emails. For one, because it’s entertaining (at least to me) and also because most people learn best by example. 

(Which is why I use one of the most popular shows in cable TV history to explain personality typing and what different types “look” like— a sort of “Typology-in Action.”)

Recently this sort of blew up in my face (and my Twitter mentions) when I was accidentally roped into an ongoing Twitter feud by sharing some embarrassing dating stories on social media. 

Turns out, rappers of yore don’t like being associated with bad dates with millennial men and so I was called, among a few things, a white supremacist—making me what I would assume to be one of the few LatiNazis out there.

But, racial contradictions aside: 

There are particular personality types who almost *only* can understand the world and the information given to them by example. 

I talk about this in a recent episode in Biz Typology (specifically the episode called “S-ual Harassment”)  where I shared how, while working in one of the biggest plaintiff’s litigation firms in New York, using examples and analogies helped me communicate clients who were more often than not extremely frustrated with their case, the legal system—and, by extension, me.

By knowing this quirky tool (and understanding why I had to use it), I was able to calm down understandably stressed, hurt, and tired clients into doing what it is that I needed them to do—not only so they wouldn’t yell at me, but so I could better prosecute their case. 

(Of course, I only realized after the fact that using an example to teach the power of example made this the most meta Biz Typology episode so far.)

While this was helpful in getting my personal injury clients to cooperate so I can better prosecute their case (and sometimes to stop yelling at me) this is especially useful when used in business and marketing—from talking stressed and frustrated clients off the ledge in order to listen to your advice (if you’re a consultant or a freelancer), to turning a frustrated burnt-out lead into a ready, willing and even excited client. 

(And, yes—this is also helpful when dealing with social media trolls. By using examples, you can poke holes in their arguments with swift derision.) 

To learn more by example (sans hate-mongering tweets), go here:

Stefanie Arroyo