The George Constanza School of Mind-Control

Last night, I watched the “Pez Dispenser” episode of Seinfeld. It was a great episode, but not for the obvious candy references.

In it, George was worried that his uppity girlfriend was about to break up with him. 

The end was inevitable. And he was pissed.

(After all, she demoted him from a dinner date to, “let’s get lunch.”)

It wasn’t so much that he’d miss her as much as he wanted to save face. (As he put it, he wanted, just for once in his life, to have the upper hand. She was dunking over his head so much, he had no hand to speak of.) 

So, Kramer gives him the idea to break up with her first. 

By preemptively breaking up with her,  he’d turn around his losing hand—by flipping the entire Monopoly board over. And it wasn’t like he had anything to lose anyway.

And, as reverse-psychology would have it, it worked. Or, as he said: not only did he have the upper hand for once, he had so much hand “it was coming out of his gloves.”

After threatening to break up, she was willing to do everything and anything to make him stay. 

(Of course, they broke up anyway, but that’s Constanza for you.) 

Anyway, here’s the point:

By understanding people’s hot buttons, you can basically make them do whatever you want. 

Whether it’s objections on a sales call or your own frigid relationship you want to defrost, you can turn it around—but, only if you know what they’re thinking (or feeling) first. 

Even if you have a crap set of properties and keep rolling bad dice, you can flip the Monopoly board to your own advantage.

Which, is one of the things I talk about in the latest season of The HR Czar—specifically in a short, 10-minute episode called “HR F-Ups,” where I talk about how I flipped the Monopoly board on a rather problematic Constanza-like colleague and got her to do whatever I wanted (for good, of course). 

With just one little change (so not even a full flip of the game board), I was able to coax someone who lived to make staff members’ lives hell into becoming my champion in the workplace. 

(This is especially helpful when dealing with reckless trolls online, unruly clients, or even if you sensing some pushback—or freeze-out—in your personal relationships.) 

This episode—and about 20 others—is immediately available to watch (and implement) in my membership site, Biz Typology. 

And—in flipping my own personal pool table—at the end of this weekend, I will be *removing* one of my highest value bonuses that’s currently available free to Biz Typology subscribers: a two-hour training on how to create your own continuity product (whether it be your own newsletter, membership site, or other kinds of recurring offers) using your own unique personality type. 

In this training, I pull the curtain completely back in how I created my membership site—from creation to execution, soup to nuts, including the backend tech parts—that worked for my specific personality type, and how to do the same for yours. 

(And, no, I’m not talking about a cut-and-paste swipe of my own business like some folks do—I mean how to create an offer that works for you, your way.)

But, this training will be disappearing from the membership site after this Sunday. 

Which means, not only do you have to join by Sunday, but you have to have consumed it by then, too. 

Otherwise, you’ll have to wait until it’s available as its own info product—for about $297 or so. 

(Talk about flipping shizz over.) 

To get immediate access to the HR Czar—and to the two-hour continuity training for free—go here before deadline Sunday:

Stefanie Arroyo

Why I want to crack open my INTJ’s skull

In Gone Girl, one of my favorite movies (and not just because it’s prime Typology-in-Action material), Ben Affleck opens the film twirling his wife’s hair with his fingers, stroking her head, and having the following, mildly harrowing thought:

“When I think of my wife, I always think of the back of her head. I picture cracking her lovely skull, unspooling her brain, trying to get answers.”

This is no different than how I look at my INTJ. 

When he’s thinking (which is pretty much always) you can practically hear the cogs whirring in his brain. 

If plans have changed or if he so much as has to make a decision in any way, his brow furrows and you can hear his CPU click on, his internal processor running at full clock speed, as he rapidly computes all possible outcomes before calming giving the answer…all in about .2 seconds. 

And, not unlike Ben Affleck, it makes me want to break open this Ben’s skull to see what’s inside. 

And, frankly, this is what you should feel (or think, if you’re also a T) about your market. 

You should want to break open their skulls and see what’s going on in the inside. To want to know what they’re doing, seeing, thinking, and feeling—and why. 

Not just for shites and giggles, of course—and definitely not just for the woo-woo “love what you do” sentiment either. 

(Though that does help, that’s a typing conversation for another day.)

But so that you know what is going on in their lovely skulls so you can sell to them more, better, and smarter. Because you’ll know exactly what to say and when to say it (and why)—without so much as breaking a sweat. Sales, copywriting, and marketing won’t be a mystery anymore—and it’ll actually be *easy.*

To unspool your market’s brains (no skull-smashing needed), go here:

The Crotchety Voyages of Captain elBenbo

The other night, my INTJ and I were watching an old sea-adventure movie called “Captains Courageous.” Having been made over 80 years ago, it’s only *slightly* older than my INTJ but, like him, it has a lot of heart and business lessons (despite its/his crotchety old timey-ness). 

Here’s what I mean:  

In it, a shipping tycoon’s spoiled brat of a son—at only 10 years old—was constantly lying, cheating, and scheming his way to getting his way, at whatever cost. 

Whether it becoming an editor of the school newspaper, getting an A on his history exam, or, later, trying to get out of fish-head-cleaning duty on the fishing boat he ends up on, he (a true ENTJ, I might add) used bribery, trickery, and other such deceptions to get what he wanted, whenever he wanted, even if it meant people might get hurt, in deep water, or potentially fired.

(Not too different from the media today, but anyway.) 

At first glance, this seemed like a great high-seas, child-villainy movie. 

But, what was most notable part of the movie was that the “villain,” wasn’t really a villain at all—he was just a misguided kid stranded at sea without an outlet for his smarts.

Kind of like today’s marketers. 

They may act childish (often) and even resort to fishy double-dealing and duplicity in their marketing, but they’re not villains or even bad kids per se.

They, like our junior sea-faring Machiavelli, are just misguided. 

Admittedly, I very narrowly missed that duplicitous sandpit while copywriting in the coaching niche—using cheesy “sales ladder” posts to promote my services (not even my list), focusing on faux props-giving via likes and comments to build “rapport” with my audience, and relying on faulty, unreliable partnerships to build my business. And, like most Facebookpreneurs, I made sure everything looked smooth-sailing on the (perfectly manicured) outside, while, internally, I was practically seasick, constantly scrambling for clients all day, every day. 

Which, by definition, meant I was a liar, just with nice branding.

Alas, like our evil Richie Rich, I discovered the error of my ways—but only after a beer-battered, salty old pirate mentor like Ben Settle, eyepatch and wooden leg, almost made me walk the plank.

And by “threw me into the ocean,” I mean teaching me (even if by baptism-by-fire) his fish stench-free ways to clear entrepreneurial waters, as a captain my own ship—without having to rely on my twin life-preservers to save me. 

(He even has a plaque on his wall that says, “It’s a swell ship for the skipper, but a hell ship for the crew.”) 

If you’re struggling to right your business-ship, Captain Ben Settle’s 10-Minute Workday program may be the Dramamine you’re looking for. And, it’s available for a cool, salty $1,000 off—but, only until TONIGHT only. 

And, as an extra buoy-bonus, I am offering a 45-minute Typology consult on how to get your own 10-Minute Workday business off the dock, according to your personality type—which is exactly what I did for my business, using what ol’ Benbeard personally taught me.

Think of it as a map of your own personal tradeswinds—and since my 1:1 consulting starts at $1,000 per month (and will be climbing much, much higher soon), at a pretty good rate of gratis, too. 

All you need to do is use my link and forward me your receipt.

To sign up for the 10MWD program and book your consult, get your booty here: 

Alas, the ship has sailed on this sale. But, that doesn’t mean you’re shyt out of luck just yet:

To get first (or even advanced) notice of when Ben Settle’s 10-Minute Workday program goes on sale (for up to an astonishing $1,000 off), plus extra 1:1 coaching bonuses that are available hardly anywhere else, then you may want to get on my list.

To get on my ship’s manifest (and get an advanced captain’s call of when 10-Minute Workday goes on sale), then go here:

elBenbo’s white mirror dystopia

This past week, my INTJ has finally joined the rest of the binging Netflix universe and started watching the show, Black Mirror. 

(If you haven’t seen it yet, it’s the best episodic dystopian nightmare you could ever want. It’s great.) 

While watching it, however, he’s insisted on skipping a particular episode that is arguably the best—and definitely the most famous—of the whole series. 

It’s won Emmys and BAFTAs for its tremendous acting, writing, and production, and not to mention the hearts of countless bloggers worldwide with its sad story. 

But, even with all that, he won’t watch it. In fact, he especially won’t watch it knowing that it won so many accolade—including my own raving, pulled-heartstring review, going so far as to say:

“If it made you cry, I’m not interested.”

The more popular something is, the more skeptical he is, and my tears only sealed that deal. 

But I keep holding out anyway. Especially since, according to him, even the most boring, feelsy chick flick can be made exciting with some bloodthirsty zombie or killer robot bees thrown in. 

(I suspect if a swarm of killer robot bees had been sent through time to kill the main characters of that Black Mirror episode, he’d have watched it several times over already…)

Until then, speaking of Black Mirror: 

It’s amazing how much the Internet marketing community has already devolved into Charlie Brooker’s grim, apocalyptic imaginings. But, where he writes as fiction, it has become all too real: 

– Caring more for likes and comments than sales
– Falling blindly for the next big software all-in-one—no matter how much data, man-hours, and funds it steals (and sells)
– Relying only on social media to build their businesses
– Using all the overcomplicated funnel tactics of upsells, downsells, sidesells, and tracking all the things including eyeball movements on a page.

Ben Settle, on the other hand, took the red pill of Internet marketing and hasn’t fallen for the Black Mirrorian utopia—in fact, elBenbo’s created his own white mirror world that’s simple, efficient, and effective.

Maybe it’s because he’s trained in 100-year old direct response methods.
Maybe it’s because he’s a technophobic recluse.
Maybe it’s because he’s Gen X. 

Either way, his ways are stable, scalable, and, most importantly, profitable. 

I can personally attest to this as, through his methods, I had the single biggest launch of my business to date—with no paid ads, webinars, funnels-on-funnels-on-funnels, or anything remotely technical. 

In fact, I think I made a total of ONE social media post the entire time—and still managed to convert almost 20% of my list. 

And, from now until this Wednesday, his 10-Minute Workday program, which describes exactly how to do this for your own business, is available for an almost absurd $1,000 off. (As it’s normally $2,500, that’s nothing to sniff at.) 

Plus, if you purchase through my link (I am an affiliate as my way to sing about his teachings from the rooftops), I will give you a free 45-minute Typology consult on how to create your 10-Minute Workday business, your way—to create your offer and plan in a way that matches your personality type best. 

(FYI: to work with me starts at $1,000 a month—and will soon be 5 times that after the next couple of weeks.)

All you need to do is use my link and forward me your receipt. 

To sign up for the 10MWD program and book your consult, use this link (and don’t forget to send me the receipt) here: 

This sale is long over—and the bonuses have since expired.

But, there is still hope…

To get first notice (or even advanced notice) of when Ben Settle’s 10-Minute Workday program goes on sale, to do is stretch your little icky fingers here and enter your email when prompted:


During one of my INTJ’s favorite activities—sitting next to each other in silence while on our respective laptops—he turned to me and asked me some banal TV trivia question. 

(I think it had something to do with the show Black Mirror, his latest obsession.) 

But, before I could give him the answer, he followed it with: 

“It’s not because my Google is broken—it’s just faster to ask you.”


Actually, at first I was flattered—and, as an Extrovert, even posted about it on Facebook. I mean, who doesn’t want to be considered faster than Google? 

Then I later realized he wasn’t blowing smoke up my ace—he was being efficient.

Which is exactly how my INTJ does everything, including making monie, too. It has to be simple and efficient—or he can’t (or, in my case often, won’t) do it. 

Which is why, when he taught me his 10-Minute Workday method (that I used to launch Biz Typology and liberated me from having to do client work) it made sense to me:

It, like him, is efficient and simplistic, but fiendishly effective.

While I’m almost the complete opposite personality type from him, I was still able to implement it without much kerfuffle (despite my procrastinating nature—in fact, it was almost helped by it). 

Even when my business model that is entirely different than his, too. No print newsletters (or reclusion) needed.

And, speaking of being faster than Google: 

Until Wednesday, the 10-Minute Workday program is available through AWAI for a juicy $1,000 off. His program will walk you through everything he taught me (and then some) in how to build your own 10-minute workday business. 

And, if you join the program through my link by the deadline (and forward me the receipt), I will give you a 45-minute consult on how to create (or revamp or even resurrect) your 10-Minute Workday business that works for your personality type. 

(To work with me in any 1:1 capacity starts at $1,000 a month—and will be increasing in only a few weeks—so you’ll be effectively doubling your savings.) 

To get the discount and the consult, go to this link before the deadline Wednesday here: 

This sale is already over but, if you want to know when Ben Settle’s 10-Minute Workday next goes on sale (and when new bonuses are available), then I highly suggest you join my list for first (and in some cases, advance) notice.

To join my list to get first dibs on when Ben Settle’s 10-Minute Workday goes on sale—plus a free less-than-5-minute training in a psychology technique that can help you get (and close) more clients and customers with one simple, silly question—go here:

Why Ben Settle turns his nose up on golden breasts

The other day, my INTJ and I were on line (or in line, if you’re going to be Midwestern about it) at the grocery store when I spotted something in the grocery haul of the person in front of me. 

A box of Gold’N Plump (chicken) breasts, “fried to moist, golden perfection, extra tender…raised on a farm.” 

Giggling, I saddled right up to my INTJ and flirtatiously poked him on the shoulder. Batting my eyelashes and pressing against him, I whispered in his ear with a smile: 

“That’s me.” 

To which he gruffly responded: 

“What, ‘Raised on a farm’?”

And then kept grouchily asking, “Why is that so funny?” as I wheezed with laughter all the way through the car ride home. 

It wasn’t until after we’d gotten out of the crowded grocery and tourist-season traffic that he understood what I meant. Which is understandable, as he was now free from Circles 4 and 5 of INTJ-hell and could now grumble and glower from the comfort of his own home instead of out in public. 

Speaking of INTJ-hell:

And, a lot of other people’s hells, including my own (working for other people and on someone else’s schedule): Ben Settle’s 10-Minute Workday course on how to escape the 9-5 Inferno is now available at an almost absurd discount of $1,000. 

In his program, he goes into grave, sickening detail of how he was able to singlehandedly build a 10-minute workday email business, to live client-free (and, in his case, largely people-free) for the remaining 23 hours and 50 minutes of his day. 

I can personally attest to this—not only when seeing his laptop close at 9:10 am on the dot, but also in implementing his 10MWD teachings in my own business to build and successfully launch my membership site, Biz Typology. 

This course is available year-round but is only available at nearly 50% off for the next few days. 

And, if you sign up using my link, I will personally walk you through how to create the 10-minute workday business that works best for your personality type, in a free 45-minute 1:1 consulting session. (Normally, consulting of any kind with me begins at $1,000 a month—and will be increasing by the end of this month.)

To get the $1,000 off and your bonus set-up consult, you have to sign up 1- using this link, and 2- before the deadline expires. Once you’ve signed up, just send me your receipt. 

To access the program, and your free consultation on how to use Biz Typology in your (new or improved) 10-minute workday, go here:

This sale is now over but, if you want to be in the know for the next 10-Minute Workday promotion, join my list here:

Ben Settle’s 10-minute whiskey workday

While making my INTJ’s favorite drink the other night, he commented on needing to order more of his whiskey glasses. 

See, he has special ones. They’re probably made out of some kind of kryptonite, but they also have a “B” engraved on them. 

He looked at his glass and pondering his drink (like a villain would), he said the following: 

“You know, I could order some with S’s on them.”

But, before I can swoon over upgrading from finally-leaving-my-toothbrush to getting-my-own-glassware, he continued with: 

“…and, if we break up, my last name starts with S anyway.”

Thing is, I don’t need a Cosmopolitan quiz to tell me what he meant—by being a Thinking type, he’s logically seeing the binary of our relationship through to the end. 

(Not too different than when Dr. Strange can see the possibilities of all outcomes all at once—even if it’s the “end game.”) 

More importantly, the whole reason why special kryptonian glasses with my name (or his) on them are headed our way…and I’m able to email about it like it’s my job (because it is)…is because of his 10-minute workday. 

For the next couple of days, Ben Settle’s 10-Minute Workday program is going on super-duper sale (a whole $1,000 buckaroos off)—but only for a couple of days.

His email and business-building methods is the direct cause and catalyst of the most successful launch of my career thus far. It is the whole reason I was able to leave the client-to-client, feast-to-famine merry-go-round in favor the hours (and deadlines) of my choosing with my own signature program, Biz Typology, with a full roster of consulting clients.

And, as a proud affiliate, and in testimony of, his nefarious time-saving ways, I’m offering a super-duper bonus to go along with the 10MWD sale: by purchasing through my link this week, I am offering free 45-minute consult on creating your (new or maybe improved) 10-minute workday business according to your personality type. 

Or, as I prefer, getting your own glassware engraved with your own unique (personality) initials. 

To get your free 45-minute set-up consult, and the $1,000 discount, simply use my link below and send me the receipt. 

Go here: 

This (ridiculously good) sale is long over but, if you want immediate notice of when the next time Ben Settle’s 10-Minute Workday is discounted, then sign up for my email list for first dibs:

Marketing secrets of an Intermittent jerk

Lately, as most women do when still on the “young and pretty” side of the Wall, I’ve started taking better care of my health. 

One of the ways I’ve been doing that is Intermittent Fasting. Basically, I stop eating at a certain time (usually 6pm) and don’t eat again until later the next day, ideally after 16 hours or so. 

(Which incidentally is how I stayed fighting fit while in law—except then, I was just too busy to eat.) 

Like with all things new and shiny, I wanted to know everything there is to know about Intermittent Fasting, joining all the online communities, and reading all I can about the magical and transformative properties of IF.  And, since I was now a dedicated faster, I also bought the necessary app to keep track of my progress. 

Naturally, I wanted to share all this new! exciting! information about intermittent fasting with my INTJ: 

“Do you want to see my app? I just got one that tracks when you started fasting and when it’s safe to stop.”

“I already have one—it’s called a clock.”

See, he already had been intermittent fasting off and on for over ten years. 

And, in those ten years, didn’t see any need to complicate it any more than need be: you eat until a certain time, and then you stop. Rinse, repeat. 

(Which is no different than his plain-text philosophy for email and marketing in general.)

But, being my personality type, I thought I needed the ClickFunnels of IF to succeed. 

Truth is, I don’t. 

And the same goes for all the bells and whistles of “market research” like complicated, redundant surveys, “human performance hacking” like Fascinate or “self-mastery” like (ugh) Human Design. 

All you need is a few questions, that so happened to be backed by nearly 100-year old science, and a little bit of patience. 

And, maybe a subscription to Biz Typology. 

For more (no app needed), go here:

My INTJ’s missing kidney

The other day, I came across a story about a certain popular pop singer who received the ultimate gift from her best friend—a new, and much-needed, kidney.

(Which, contrary to much of social media this week, I think is way more impressive than Meghan Markle’s friend indirectly making her a Duchess.) 

After reading this, I turned to my INTJ, looked him dead in the eye, and asked nicely: 

“Would you give me a kidney if I needed it?”

And, before I could add “pretty please,” he rather firmly answered: 

“No. I need a backup kidney.”

So it is. 

And, more importantly, I know *why* it is—he’s simply being strategic and efficient as always, including with his filtration organs. 

(That is, if he doesn’t wake up in a tub of ice first.) 

In the meantime, to learn more about who is likely to give you an organ (or if you should drink more water), and how to use this knowledge to make more money, get better clients, and have more harmonious relationships, go here:

The Secret of the Black Chicken

A few months ago at the local feed store (or as I call it, the PetSmart for Horses, Too), my INTJ was picking up food for his beloved (non-horse) pet when something in the little chick hatchery nearby caught my eye. 

The one chick to rule them all. 

This chick didn’t look like the rest—where everyone was yellow and fluffy, he was scruffy and black. And looked… almost angry?

Sitting on the water feeder, this Gargamel chick seemed to want nothing to do with the rest of the chick-clan. He was even turned away from the rest. 

To anyone else, this would seem like a case of the Ugly Duckling gone nuclear, with possible evidence of cyber-bullying. Or some fowl version of Ted Kaczynski. 

Instead, I just saw my INTJ in poultry form. And, when showing this to him, he agreed. 


It’s not that chicks (or people) hate him. And, it’s not that he hates them either. It’s more so that he wants to be left alone. And yet, at the top of the water feeder (or, in my INTJ’s case, off a cliff at the western edge of the US) he reaches a strange homeostasis of being away from others…but not necessarily minding them so much. 

Kind of like what the Patrice O’Neal joke my INTJ frequently paraphrases (when wanting some personal space): 

I don’t want you in the same room with me… but I want you in the house. 

Which, is a critical difference. For me and other chicks, fowl or otherwise, around the world. 

To learn this difference no matter what your (or their) personality type is, in 8 short-bite videos (with 7 more forthcoming in just a few days), plus weekly live calls on how to avoid the hen or doghouse both in business AND personal in either case, go here: